Friday, July 12, 2013

Grow up!


Getting Older

I’ve been thinking a lot about time and age and how we sometimes fail to notice that time has aged us.  I don’t know why.  Well, actually, I could probably venture a guess or two.  It could be because I am generally the oldest person in the room at work.  Or maybe because I am always the oldest person in the room at home.  It could be because I’ve been trying to revisit my formative years a lot to figure out where Radley is at, developmentally.   It could be because on my last birthday, my 33rd birthday, a dear friend told me “you don’t look a day over 40.”  It might even because, the other day when Radley was sick, I turned on the Science channel and watched this show called “Into the Wormhole” with Morgan Freeman and it was about how the passing of time is an illusion that humans created to help explain life’s uncertainty.  It was way too far over my head for me to make any sense out of…but between the program content  and the fact that I was watching Science channel instead of MTV, clearly makes a statement about my age.  And it probably fucked with my psyche a little, too.  So anyway, I’ve been thinking a lot about getting older. 

Glory Days

Several times this week, I caught myself talking about a different time or thinking of myself in that same time.  Yesterday I asked this guy “Hey, do you know ‘such and such,’ he was stationed there in 2007.”  There was silence.  Then he said “Uh…Ang…Nobody here now was here in 2007.”  Oh right.  Because that was SIX YEARS AGO???  Sometimes, I still think it might be 2007.   Or earlier, even.   Right now, Eve 6 is playing on iTunes.  For all I know, it’s 1997.  Anyway.   Later,  I was talking to someone else about a dive bar I frequented in my early 20’s.  I told him I was an icon there.  He asked “Is that place still open?”  [serious face]  “YES IT’S STILL OPEN!!!!!”  [internal sad face] “Is it still?”  That’s when I got quiet.  It hit me.  I am NOT in my twenties anymore.  And I am no longer an icon.  My day’s purpose is no longer getting out of work on time to have beer and wings at Scobies. My weekends of BBQs and concerts and sports have been gone for years.   My strategic plans to save the world have been replaced with ambitions of keeping my child clothed, fed and housed.   AND, in the off chance I do go to a bar, I have to pay for my drinks now.   What is that about?  When did it happen? 

Knees

I’ll tell you when it happened.  It happened the morning of my 30th birthday.  When I got out of bed and fell down because both of my knees gave out on me.  I always give my friends a hard time when they turn thirty.  Because that’s when you notice your bones ache, you realize that you should be wearing your glasses, you drink twice as much coffee to stay awake in the morning and people actually start looking younger than you do.  It starts with your knees on the morning of your 30th birthday, and every day after that, you realize something else that makes you feel old.  Like the kid who never heard of Top Gun.  I’m sorry.  There is no excuse for that.  These kids are growing up in the technological age.  They should know Top Gun.  And Gremlins.  And The Breakfast Club.  And when they tell me they don’t know what I’m talking about, I secretly can’t wait for them to have to grow up.  And by grow up, I mean I can’t wait until their knees fail them on their 30th birthday.  Or for the day they read Smithsonian magazine instead of Maxim.  Oh wait, never mind.  They don’t teach reading anymore. 

Growing up

Life was advertised  to be different.  When you were a child, you were taught that by the time you hit a certain age, you are grown.  You don’t have to worry about any of those awkward growing pains anymore.  You just get to do your own thing.  And you will be happy doing your own thing.  Because it’s yours…You get to make the rules.   I wish I had a buzzer from one of those old 80’s game shows to buzz right now.  Because that is wrong.  You don’t ever get to do your own thing.  You don’t ever get to be your own boss.  If you are going to be a responsible member of the community, you always have rules to follow.   You have to accept the consequences of too many late bar nights, too many squandered opportunities, and too many debts to pay.  However, you also get to enjoy the benefits of experience, knowledge, the humility that only time can teach.   I don’t know if it’s a fair tradeoff, but if you are aware, you realize that your only option is to keep growing.  Even if it hurts (your knees).  That’s where we have to find our inner peas. 

 

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